limbo

I constantly feel as though everything is in limbo. The house, TTC, job, friends, the list goes on. All I think about these days is trying to start a family. But I know we need to be responsible and get the things done to the house before we start TTC.
On our honeymoon we had talked about our plan for when to start. We decided that we would first get the kitchen done. A reasonable timeline we agreed was 4-5 months. That would mean we would start TTC in April or May. Ok, so I wanted to start sooner, but this was our compromise. Then of course we get the notice from the insurance company that if our roof isnt replaced by Nov 2011 they'll drop our policy. can you say BRICK WALL. Thanks insurance co. :(
So we talked again, we cant really afford both the kitchen and a roof within 4-5 months. And although we have till Nov, we cant actually wait till then. For one, trying to do a roof in south florida during hurrican season and/or rainy season would be absolutely ridiculous. So that pushes the roof before the kitchen. I  knew as I said it what it meant, "So we have to push TTC farther back?" yep :(
Well we finally did our taxes last night with my aunt. Seems like we are getting more back than I had hoped. That means that maybe with the money from the wedding and our tax refund 4-5months is still possible? I didnt want to bring it up with DH right away. I feel like if he does realize I have baby fever he may freak out.
But then I start thinking, what if we have trouble TTC? They say that it takes 6months to year to regulate your cycles after being on birth control for so long. What if it takes us a long time to get pregnant? Should we start now, that way it goes faster? But then what if I get pregnant on the first cycle, cause that happens too. And in that case the roof and kitchen arent done. Then I kind of feel like, well hell we have 9 months before the baby actually comes, why cant we do the renovations during that time. Thats where DH and his responsible self come in, he doesnt think its safe for me being pregnant to be in a house under construction (I know how cute, hes thinking like a father and good husband).
Then I have my sis and one of my good friends constantly asking when Im going to get pregnant. Trust me girls, I want to, its just not that easy right this second. I guess I just needed to get that all out. Back to limbo I go.....