8/27/13

the marry-wed game

Recently Ive become more aware of the dynamics of my marriage. Most likely due to lots of friends getting married within the next year. Now, i am no expect by any means, when it comes to the success of marriage, but i do feel like I have a little bit of an upper hand considering hubs and I have been together for going on 11 years (2.5 of those being married). I know we're young and still have alot to learn, but it feels nice to have my newly-engaged or newly-wed friends come to us for some advice. Granted the questions are more like "It gets better right?" and "All of this is worth it right?"

Now, lets start the off by saying I do love being married, but the hard honest truth is marriage isnt necessarily about how much you love someone. Instead, to me at least, its about how much you are willing to constantly work on having a relationship with another person for the rest of your life. Yes there are many good times, fun memories, romantic nights, and life events that just make you smile and your heart beat a lil faster. But there are a hell of a lot arguments, disagreements, and just plain old trying days too. Some like to phrase it as "picking your battles." Which indeed is true. Just like you as a person change as you grow older, so does your marriage. And quite honestly sometimes the physical day-to-day becomes so routine that you kind of feel like youre in a slump. You see this person everyday, talk to them numerous times a day, and usually if anything new happens the other person is standing right there with you as it happens. Conversation are based on house projects, kids, finances, etc. And so it becomes hard sometimes to just enjoy a conversation with each other because you feel like there is nothing new to talk about.

This brings me to the real point of this post, sorry i got so deep up there ;)

I have a board on pinterest that is completely dedicated to married life. I like to go back to it every now and then when i feel like we are in a "slump." And for those of you who have your head in the gutter, im not talking about physically :P but more about the relationship itself. I pin things like date nights, quotes, gift ideas, etc. Well i came across this pin last night that was a little game, kinda like the newlywed game. Only it was catered more towards people already married, and basically was comprised of 20 questions on how well you know your significant other. Normally hubs isnt real into doing these things because they end up taking a long time, but seeing as Matthew was already asleep and we were just hanging out back on our patio, we decided to give it a try. (Note: i clicked on the pin and it keeps taking me to an error page, so i took it upon myself to make a lil printable/graphic)


I thought it would be fun to share our answers. Hubs answers for me are in blue, mine for him are in pink. Anything in italics is the other persons comments to the answers.



1. fav comfort food
mac & cheese and pork loin <yep>
mexican food or chicken parm <so which one?> probably chicken parm <yep>
  
2. dream job
stay at home mom <i was so wondering if you would think that as a job, good answer>
probably a wildlife enforcement officer, although its hard because you just recently changed careers <yeah, i would probably go with having my own recruiting agency>

3. bed cover hogger
YOU!
hehe (lmao)

4. fav color
purple....blue <well i kinda have alot, purple, blue, teal, pink>
green? <actually blue, but i like green too> thats probably because i always take the blue stuff and give you green

5. toothbrush color
 light blue? <yep>
green! please refer back to question 4 ;)

6. last book read
well you havent read 50 shades of grey, was it one of those eclipse, vampire books? <eclipse? you mean the twilight series? > yeah the vampire book <lol, no it was the hunger games series >
i cant remember the last time you even read a book, but i know what book you would read again <what?> the old man and the sea <yeah, and that was probably the last book i read too lol>
 
7. fav hobby
photography <yea>
fishing, or golfing now <yeah, but id still rather go fishing>

8. fav date night
dinner and movie
same

9. strangest gift
ive never really gotten a strange gift
yeah, we dont really get strange gifts for each other 

10. best vacation
either our honeymoon cruise or cruise we got engaged on
defintely the cruise we got engaged on, it was really the only vacation we have gone on alone and had a really good time without anyone else  
<note: on our honeymoon we met with my best friend when she lived in st thomas, so it tech wasnt completely alone> 

11. first date
skipping school and going to the court house <that wasnt really a date>
i dont think we actually ever went on a "first date" <we went on alot of date> 
12. first kiss
same as question 11 <we didnt kiss that day>
honestly cannot remember <so it was the time at the court house> no, i promise you we did not kiss that time, but i just cant remember when the first time was :/

13. fav dessert
strawberry shortcake <and chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and cannolis....i have a sweet tooth>
tiramisu <yep>

14. fav sport
softball <probably>
baseball or golfing <yeah probably>

15. fav restaurant
melting pot <fo sho!>
Roasted Pepper, Franco & Vinnies, Giannis, anything italian, oh and mexican too! <Roasted Pepper is too far, but yeah prob all of those> 

16. excites you
<somehow we completely missed this question. oops>

17. name of first pet
butterscotch? <close, cinnamon, but they were both golden retreivers>umm, chuck? <no cracker, a black lab> cracker? why did you name your black lab cracker?
<because his tail was constantly hitting the wall, and it made a crack sound>

18. fav household chore
making the beds <i guess, i dont really like any chores lol>cooking dinner <i dont think thats a chore but ok> 
19. home from work, first activity
to say hi to matthew
<well i was going to say, go pick up matthew, but same thing>go take a poop (sorry tmi) <i always say hi to my son first...then go poop> lmao

20. eggs cooked
scrambled, with cheese, the way i make them <YEP!>over easy, a little runny <thats not how you order them, you just say over easy, then i make them runny> whatevs

So basically, hubs knows me extremely well, and i could probably pay a little bit more attention lol, but at least we had a good 20mins of casual fun conversation. I definitely suggest trying this with you significant other and see how well you now each other! If you do, blog about it and leave the link so I can read all about it!

 




2 comments:

  1. I love this post! Marriage is no walk in the park. We are coming up on 5 years and knew each other for about 8-9 months before we eloped and said "I do." We have had our challenges (multiple deployments and now he is getting medically retired from active duty for combat related injuries) and it has NOT been easy. Worth it? Yes. But so not easy.

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